Focus. What do you focus on? This blog seemed to tie in to Valentine’s Day coming up, so…
How can you fall out of love with your job? At Southwestern, you can notice how few people say yes, on the heat, on random negative thoughts, on how you dislike the feeling of failure, on the weight of your bookbag. If this is what you notice–what you give your attention to–soon, you will be falling out of love with your sales job.
Now to your significant other. Remember all the habits that you once found cute, or overlooked? His inability to ask for directions, his talking with his mouth full, his leaving his dirty clothes all over the floor? Early on in your relationship, you overlooked these foibles and concentrated on what you loved about him. You were noticing his strengths and ignoring his weaknesses. (You could fix those up later, right?)
Now, what you ignored you notice–all those habits become irritations. The crumbs on the counter, never replacing the toilet paper roll, all the time he spends with his friends…what a schmuck! (How did I ever like him?) You are noticing what you don’t like. You will fall out of love at some point and may not know why!
So, since this is a sales blog and not eHarmony, it might be time to refocus your focus–in other words, if you’re tired of your sales career, you may want to notice what you’re noticing. You may need to decide to be grateful.
Here are a few good questions to ask yourself at the end of the day:
What have I given today? (not gotten, given)
What have I learned today? (people who are learning are liking what they do)
How has today been an investment for my future? (not just a day closer to the weekend)
What do I love about what I do?
After you have been in a love relationship or a career for awhile, the shiny newness tends to wear off. When it does–and it will–you have to be deliberate in your focus. You have to affirm what you want, consciously. Left to my own devices, my mind automatically drifts into negativity. It’s far easier for me to notice what’s wrong than what’s right. Are you like this? I have to consciously make an effort. At times, I have to notice what I like/love about my job–and my wife. I’m sure she has to do the same.
A sales career, a loving relationship–both take energy and investment to work over the long haul. Action point: Send your sales opportunity some flowers or a nice box of chocolates. It deserves it.
I welcome your thoughts and comments. What are your strategies to stay in love with what you do?
This is something I probably say 50 times during each checkout season at Southwestern. During that time, hundreds of student salespeople are finishing their summers and are considering returning for another summer. Or not.
“I think I could learn this stuff somewhere else.”
“I don’t like selling.”
“I hated it.”
True, more or less. But what I often remind them about is that our program didn’t create the personal shortcomings they experienced—it simply revealed them. Difficult circumstances reveal what you’re made of. So we (I do the same thing) tend to rationalize away our sub-par behavior and blame our situation.
“Southwestern made me this way.” Nope, sorry. Southwestern (better yet, the challenges) revealed your character.
Oftentimes, the desire to move on to other opportunities is another form of “the grass is greener” syndrome. You can change your job, you can switch your role, you can get a different spouse–but you still have to live with yourself. You take your luggage with you.
If only the weather were better, people were friendlier, there were more folks employed, less traffic, a different administration, better prospects, a new sales territory…we’d probably be happy right where we are. The problem is there’s too much pressure here, too many frustrations. The answer seems simple enough—move, switch, change jobs, quit!
The problem is that when we move on in our search, we take ourselves along. Where we are is where we’ve chosen to be. If we don’t look at ourselves, we’ll choose the same people & predicaments again.
There is enormous freedom in realizing this truth. So, own up. Remember, you take your luggage with you.
Whether you sell books with Southwestern, or sell real estate, cars, clothes, insurance, stocks, or sales seminars, you experience frustration from time-to-time. When it happens, we make blanket statements which convey our upset. We declare our negative feelings through our self-talk. Our self-talk, in turn, leads us to an emotional state which then affects our behavior. Welcome to a potential Sales Slump.
So how do you regain perspective? I’ve found one great way to bounce back mentally:
Ask “Compared to what?” Compare your situation to someone else who has exponentially more to deal with. Using the “My life stinks” example above, yes, your life does stink until you compare your problems with a Haitian citizen who lost everything in an earthquake, or with someone you know whose child has died. When you make that quick comparison, you think, “Well, my life isn’t that bad.” If you think, “my job sucks,” then ask compared to what? Compared to not having one? I’m sure you would appreciate your sucky job more when you ponder being one of the millions of Americans who are out of work right now. See? Instant gratitude.
My fifth year as a bookman, there was a week when I really hated my life, my team, & my summer work. I mean I was seriously negative. My self-talk was crap. My expectations were low, to say the least. Obviously, my sales were tanking. I wasn’t getting in doors, customers were not responding and I was FRUSTRATED! I’d even forgotten my “compared to what” technique….
God then decided to help give me some perspective: I trudged up to another house, glancing at the ramp to the front door. After I knocked, a young boy opened the door—from his wheelchair—gave a big smile, and cheerfully said, “Hi! Can I help you?” Wow. Ding! New perspective! Instantly! I thought I had problems—until I met this young man whose legs didn’t work. Yet he was happy, and I had my head up my butt.
So the good news is you can make this shift without God having to intervene. We are constantly evaluating what is going on around us, labeling experiences, talking to ourselves, making judgments…it’s impossible to turn our minds off, but you can keep the negativity in check, by asking, “compared to what?”
“Any act often repeated forms a habit; and habit allowed, steadily gains in strength. At first it may be but as a spider’s web, easily broken through, but if not resisted it soon binds us with chains of steel.”
–Tryon Edwards
“I’m getting ready to commence to begin to start to recruit.” This isn’t an exact quote, but I’ve heard several excuses from Southwestern Company student managers over the years regarding recruiting and getting their teams started. Confusion and procrastination are often just cop-outs (“cop-out”, for my international friends, means “excuse”).
Usually we know very well what needs to be done and we even know how to do it. As we’ve often said, “Recruiting/selling is simple—but it’s not easy!” Oftentimes, if we’re honest, we have to admit the “what am I supposed to do?” isn’t the real question at all.
Any young athlete knows what to do: you don’t miss practices, you sacrifice video games after school, and you drill new techniques over and over until they feel natural and automatic. Good students, too, understand that they need to hit the books no matter how they feel. They practice good study habits until they have good study habits.
Achieving your sales goals, reaching your recruitment goals, having an improved new year consists of conscientiously repeating positive actions—nothing real mysterious or confusing about it. We must be willing to exercise the discipline if we want to reap the rewards.
Today, I will welcome the patterns that lead to success, and this will lead to a very Happy New Year. As always I welcome your comments!
It is incredibly common to hear people at self improvement seminars trying to discover their “strengths” and “weaknesses”. Everyone–including Southwestern Company trainers–has their own philosophy on how to deal with these. Some life coaches will tell you, “The key is turning your weaknesses into strengths!” Others insist, “The only way to reach your potential is to focus on your strengths and find positions in life that minimize the impact of your weaknesses. Focusing on your weaknesses is a waste of time!” These are only two examples of a whole multitude of options on how to get to know yourself better and improve as a person. None of these are bad philosophies, and all of them have lots of good ideas to draw from. The problem is that most people fail to recognize the difference between a specific skill that can be developed and a mental or emotional characteristic they would like to change in themselves. The unfortunate reality is that it is far easier to get better at a specific skill than it is to completely shift the way your brain operates.
In reality we all have points in our lives when we are so on that our “weaknesses” are barely noticeable or are completely non-existent. Our strengths are all that we see. We are in the zone. And then there are some points in our lives where we are just off. At these times we have no discernable strengths and our weaknesses seem overpowering! So trying to think through your weaknesses and fix them, or attempting to isolate your strengths and maximize them, can often times be a very frustrating endeavor. When we are in the zone we feel like we have arrived! “I did it! I conquered my weaknesses!” Then we later get in a funk and the logical conclusion we come to is, “I have accomplished nothing. I really thought I was getting better this time!” Instead of isolating what our strengths and weaknesses are, a far more productive exercise is to spend some time answering the following questions:
1) What am I like when I am on?
2) What am I like when I am off?
3) What are my habits when I am on?
4) What are my habits when I am off?
The first thing that happens after really spending time diving into this exercise is that you will begin to notice when you start to be “off” and will no longer continue to think thoughts that go something like, “There I go again. I always do that!” The biggest obstacle most people face in living the life they want to live is taking ownership of their “weaknesses”. People think that the things they dislike about themselves are somehow hardwired into their DNA. That isn’t you! That is you when you are off. This is empowering because it allows you to take a step back and think through questions 3 and 4. What have I been doing recently? What have I not been doing? For me personally, if I work out first thing in the morning and read a motivational book before breakfast, it is going to be a great day! If my thoughts are primarily focused on others or focused on long term goals then I am loving life. I absolutely love my job if I am spending most of my time in front of people, truly listening, and learning new things from every person I meet. If I am spending a ton of mental energy focused on trivial problems or manifesting negative situations in my mind that “may” unfold; I am irritable, easily frustrated, and generally don’t enjoy life. This is true in both my career and family life. This knowledge is power.
So catch yourself. Notice when you are starting to slip. However, it takes more than simply catching yourself in a destructive pattern. You have to take immediate action! Get back to the habits that lead to the best version of you. Go do the things that give you confidence and lead to you loving life. This seems obvious, and yet the truth about human existence is that it takes much less effort to be neutral or negative than it takes to be positive and optimistic. But it is worth it. Life is more fun and more rewarding. It is all about your habits.
The reality is that you are always in habit patterns whether good or bad. If you wake up every morning and decide whether or not to exercise, it is tough! You are in the habit of indecision. If you just wake up and do it every single morning for 3 weeks, it will be hardwired into you. You don’t even think about it. It is like this in all of your habits. This is not just about what you do with your mornings. You are constantly forming habits at work, with your family, with your friends, and with your own thoughts. So form good ones! If you struggle in forming these habits in any area, get an accountability partner. Find some way to hold yourself accountable. Do whatever it takes. The key is, DO IT! Stop procrastinating. Stop saying that you will form good habits next week. Don’t wait until it becomes convenient. There is nothing more important than you being the best version of yourself. It impacts everything. So what could me more important than forming the habits that lead to this? Anything that is worth doing in life is bound to be challenging. However, if you will stop banging your head against the wall trying to determine why you can never get rid of personality trait x, and instead really hone in on the habits that make you great, the battle you will be fighting will at least lead more directly to living life the way you want to live it!
I consider myself a documentary aficionado. I watch them all the time – regardless of the subject and it is probably my favorite genre of film. This last weekend I found myself in utter amazement watching Ultramarathon Man.
For those of you, like me, who were out of loop – Ultramarathon Man follows Dean Karnazes on his goal to run 50 marathons, in all 50 states, in 50 days. You read that correctly. 50/50/50. I couldn’t believe the goal, much less the fact that anyone was in the conditioning to complete such a task. His goal was to finish this unbelievable achievement to raise awareness for youth obesity and to get America active.
Dean starts his journey with the Lewis and Clark Marathon in St. Louis and never stops from there. While watching this film, I couldn’t believe how effortless Dean made this look! He just runs nonstop. It’s captivating how relaxed and affable he is throughout the entire movie. Every city he ran in, he had what looked like 5 to 50 people show up and run the distance with him. It was astonishing how many people he inspired.
Dean set the bar for human endurance by finishing his goal of 50/50/50 by running the New York City Marathon on the official day of the race and finished in 3 hours and 30 seconds. He overcame physical hurdles and logistical problems to finish what he started as a champion.
While watching this movie I kept thinking of the similarities to the Southwestern Company and the philosophies we teach. Dean set a goal, trained hard to reach that goal, and then finished strong. Admittedly, the average bookman/woman doesn’t run 50 marathons consecutively but there is comparison that can be made to a Southwestern summer.
I mentioned Dean Karnazes and this film to one of our Directors Chris Adams. He excitedly told me that he actively uses one of Dean’s books as inspiration for his organization during the summer. One of his Slovakian Sales Managers (and a exceptional runner himself) Mike Ulicny initially told Chris about Dean and his outstanding accomplishments.
What about you? Have you seen Ultramarathon Man or read any of Dean Karnazes books? What philosophies or life lessons can you take from his remarkable story and apply to your everyday life? This may be a great source if you look for inspirational material for your sales organization. I’m looking forward to reading your thoughts!
I was walking on campus at Michigan State University the other week at a relatively brisk pace, and thought to myself, ”I love this time of year!” It makes me think about playing backyard football when I was a kid, going to bonfires when I was in high school and college, and taking the last few walks of the season through my neighborhood with my wife and daughter holding a warm travel mug of coffee. These were the thoughts that were wandering through my head when a student I work with at Southwestern came walking up.
I hadn’t noticed him coming as we were walking in opposite directions to different destinations. “Man, what has you in such a great mood today?” he asked as he came up. “You just get some good news or something?” This startled me and distracted me from my wandering train of thought. I had to stop and think for a second. Why was I in such a great mood? The day was no different than any other day. I had not received any great news nor had any amazing things out of the ordinary going on to be excited about. Then I remembered. It was so simple.
I couldn’t believe that my mood while thinking about fall days in Michigan could be so readily apparent that someone could spot it from 20 yards away without me saying a word. I laughed and told him what I was thinking about. Later, I realized how powerful this interaction was. I always knew that attitude was important, having worked with Southwestern Company in sales. Clearly no one wants to do business with someone in a bad mood. This completely misses the point! Not being in a bad mood is only 15% of the battle. The other 85% is being in an AMAZING mood!
When you have those moments in life where you are totally content and appreciating the little things, it is overwhelmingly powerful. You have a presence about you and a joy that radiates in all directions. People cannot help but be drawn to this. This is why in sales positions sales often come in clumps. We were not necessarily depressed, frustrated, or giving off bad vibes to people prior to the first sale in the string. We were just neutral. There is no power in neutral. After that first sale we feel GREAT! There is serious power in great.
Herein lies the difference between top producers and average producers for any company. Average producers may be able to “manage” their attitude to avoid being negative. Top producers actively cultivate an attitude of thankfulness. They appear to be coming off of signing ten clients in a row even if they are in a temporary slow period. So how do we cultivate this?
Remember the sound of music! Take a minute before you approach a potential client to refocus your thoughts. Don’t frantically think through what you are going to say, or stress yourself out over being perfect. Think about previous interactions with your favorite clients. Think about the best presentations you have ever given. Leave out no details. Remember the setting, the conversation, and the atmosphere. What were you thinking? How did you feel? Also think about little things in your life that you appreciate outside of business. Remember your favorite things. This has an incredible impact. You will emanate joy and enthusiasm. Master this and you will have the mindset possessed by all top producers and your potential becomes limitless.
What are some of your favorite things which help you cultivate a great attitude? Share a comment to help others.
Whether you sell books with The Southwestern Company, or you sell cars, or medical equipment or Coke products, or real estate, you’ve experienced failure. All of us in sales have survived setbacks, slumps, and difficult slow periods. Question: were we thankful for these challenges, or did they just make us upset?
When I was selling as a college student, I learned to take emotional pain in stride. One of my favorite affirmations was: “Something about today will help me become a better father, a better teacher, a better husband…”. In other words, I was attempting to put frustrating circumstances into perspective–I was trying to reframe the situation. I told myself, “Someday this will be funny–it’ll make a great story.” (Some of you may remember The Dirt Pile story, as an example.)
Most of us survived those sales ordeals, and the fact that we went through them made us better. Think about it–most of the stuff you’ve been through by way of pain has had a refining element to it. If you workout, you can relate to what I’m saying–you push yourself, you strain your muscles, you experience pain. (During my workouts with the Masters Swim Team, I often wonder why I’m swimming at 52…). When you’re finished, when the pain ends, you feel good, you look better, your resting heart rate is low, endorphins flood your body. (In my case, you smell like Eau de Chlorine.) When you compete and win, all the pain you went through is now minimized and in perspective.
And now to the world of music! I was listening to Alanis Morissette the other day while driving. If you’re a fan of hers, you can hear the pain and anger–especially in her earlier work. Alanis has faced some life challenges, but has worked through them and is even thankful for the experience. Check out the chorus of her song, “Thank U” :
thank you india
thank you terror
thank you disillusionment
thank you frailty
thank you consequence
thank you thank you silence
If you’re experiencing a tough period in your sales/recruiting career, be thankful! What you’re experiencing is on purpose. Pain is a teacher. Difficult circumstances are the great Kiln of Life, and your “impurities” are being burned out–like dross. Be thankful, instead of put out, by your circumstances.
Do you have a story or comment about the positive side of negative circumstances? Share!
Our marketing team at Southwestern is listening to an audio project from Dan Sullivan called The Gratitude Principle. In it, Sullivan proposes that we can achieve endless progress and success in our lives as long as we are thankful each step along the way.
Have you ever met someone who was thankless? Someone who feels life owes them? (I can think of a few government entitlement programs at this point. Or ever witnessed an unhappy tot screaming because their parents didn’t give them what they wanted?) Lack of thankfulness is a huge obstacle to personal progress; Sullivan cites three:
1) People who feel sorry for themselves. These people see everyone who is getting ahead. Other people have so much! (”If I had the territory [insert top salesperson's name here] has, I could do well too!”) These folks find it harder and harder to improve their situation. They have no gratitude.
2) Self-made people. These people have done a great job working hard and creating their success, but they see all this as their own doing. They forget who helped them get where they are. (”Have you seen my latest sales award?”) They have no gratitude.
3) People “born on third base”. Some people live in advantageous circumstances and take everything for granted. As the saying goes, “they were born on third base and they think they’ve hit a triple.” When things go wrong, when it starts going downhill, these people get upset because “life’s not fair”. (”Someone’s to blame for this! It’s not my fault!”) They have no gratitude.
So how do we combat thanklessness and the negative emotions which ensue? We must understand that value & meaning are internally generated. Happiness and gratitude come from within. These states are a conscious act. In other words, we have to practice being thankful. Being thankful is not always a natural state of mind.
I heard once that the first sign of maturity in a young person is thankfulness. So since my children were little, I’d help them say prayers at night when they were going to bed. One of our first utterances has always been to talk to God about what we’re thankful for. My hope was that this attitude of gratitude would sink in, and this would mold their character for the good.
So here’s an exercise for you at Thanksgiving time: make a list of everything you’re grateful for. Your sales job, your health, your family, your friends, your country, the fact that you’re above ground! Engage the family. Have the kids make their own list. Don’t know what to say during the blessing before the big meal? Have people share their list! It is an encouraging exercise, and it can help you and your loved ones turn the tide of thanklessness.
What do you do to stay grateful? Comment and share ideas. Happy Thanksgiving!
As Southwestern Company’s sales trainer, I’m always interested in seeing how other companies’ salespeople perform when they’re making a sales call. You might say I’m a keen observer of their techniques, or lack thereof.
This week, my wife and I were considering consolidating our phone services, and getting new phones for our daughters. We headed into a local long distance service provider store (OK, it was Sprint). We walked in; the store was empty. I was excited because I knew we wouldn’t have to wait for a sales associate to finish with another client–we’d get his full attention and expertise!
“Dave” greeted us as he looked up from his PDA (we’ll call him Dave, his real name was Jake.): “Hi. Welcome to Sprint. May I help you?” Pretty neutral stuff. He didn’t look overly excited that we’d interrupted the game on his phone. Undeterred by his nonchalance, my wife cheerfully explained our problem and asked about phone plans and models.
Dave gave short answers to questions and seemed a bit annoyed that we couldn’t immediately decide how to reconcile 5 different users on 3 different plans. “Here’s the phone I like,” he said. “It’s made entirely of sustainable, biodegradeable, recycled alloids.” Or something like that. My wife and I looked at each other and thought–not a selling point for us.
Dave was not too engaged with us. Technically, he revealed some product information, but it was always in terms of his preferences, not our needs. He didn’t ask many questions; he didn’t offer many solutions. He watched us wallow in options. He did shut down one big sale though…the sale of an upgraded phone to me. How?
Background: I like buying stuff, and I like having the latest versions of equipment. I happened to show my HTC Touch Pro phone to Dave/Jake. He said something to the effect that 1) my model had problems and 2) the new HTC Titanium Quasar World Phone (something like that) was better. [Salespeople, remember: always question the customer's judgement by insulting their previous purchases.]
“New model?” I asked. (My wife quietly said, “Oh no.”) “What’s better about the upgraded phone?” Dave pointed out a couple cool new design improvements, then added, “But it costs like $549.” My wife attempted to steer the conversation back to the matter at hand–phone plan consolidation and phones for daughters. After a few minutes, I asked again about the advantages of owning the new HTC model. His response?
“Why would anyone pay that much for a phone?” Literally, that’s what he said.
Wow. (Like, “A BMW? Why would you buy that?’ Or “Who in their right mind would purchase a Goldmund Epilogue Full sound system?”) In short, are you nuts?
So, we quietly finished our conversation, without making a sale–a small one or a big one.
What are the lessons here?
Make a good first impression. Be curious about your customers and their needs.
Ask lots of questions.
Listen for nibbles: hints that guide the direction your presentation should go.
Let your customer buy. Forget your preferences and focus on what they want, not what you like.
Have you encountered a salesperson who should be in another profession? Share a tale! Or comment.
This is something I probably say 50 times during each checkout season at Southwestern. During that time, hundreds of student salespeople are finishing their summers and are considering returning for another summer. Or not. 
“Any act often repeated forms a habit; and habit allowed, steadily gains in strength. At first it may be but as a spider’s web, easily broken through, but if not resisted it soon binds us with chains of steel.”
I consider myself a documentary aficionado. I watch them all the time – regardless of the subject and it is probably my favorite genre of film. This last weekend I found myself in utter amazement watching 
Dean set the bar for human endurance by finishing his goal of 50/50/50 by running the 
Our marketing team at 
I heard once that the first sign of maturity in a young person is thankfulness. So since my children were little, I’d help them say prayers at night when they were going to bed. One of our first utterances has always been to talk to God about what we’re thankful for. My hope was that this attitude of gratitude would sink in, and this would mold their character for the good.
Sprint. May I help you?” Pretty neutral stuff. He didn’t look overly excited that we’d interrupted the game on his phone. Undeterred by his nonchalance, my wife cheerfully explained our problem and asked about phone plans and models.
