Here is an installment of Seth Godin’s blog that I found pertinent for Southwestern executives and student managers alike. Think about these seven questions he poses:
“Do you let the facts get in the way of a good story?
What do you do with people who disagree with you… do you call them names in order to shut them down?
Are you open to multiple points of view or you demand compliance and uniformity? [Bonus: Are you willing to walk away from a project or customer or employee who has values that don't match yours?]
Is it okay if someone else gets the credit?
How often are you able to change your position?
Do you have a goal that can be reached in multiple ways?
If someone else can get us there faster, are you willing to let them?
No textbook answers… It’s easy to get tripped up by these. In fact, most leaders I know do.”
So…how did you do? Most of Seth’s questions revolve around ego. Our ego is a big deal–our self-centeredness is readily apparent to other people. Sadly, many leaders who need to experience a healthy “ego check” are blissfully unaware of their shortcomings. They are happy to bend the truth a bit for a good story, or a good outcome–or a sale.
Another question for salespeople: Can you let the sale go if it’s not in the best interest of the customer? When I was selling, I sometimes let my competitiveness or my need to win (or my ego) get the best of me. I convinced myself everyone should have my product–even if they weren’t great prospects. So with that mindset, sale made, but did I help someone who probably wasn’t going to use what I was selling? No.
If you can put other people’s needs before yours, it will go well for you. At Southwestern, we call it a service-orientation: thinking of what you can do for them, not for yourself. Hopefully, you picked up on this theme during Sales School training. As Edwin Markham said, “There is a destiny among us that makes us brothers. No one goes his way alone. What we put into the lives of others, comes back into our own.” Think: am I primarily self-centered , or am I other-centered? If you’re not sure, ask a close friend you trust and who will be candid with you.
I confess my first few summers with Southwestern as a student manager, my focus was on myself. I did not get “service-mindedness.” Whether it was youthful immaturity or a heart set on self-gratification (or both), I don’t know. What I do know is true leadership, as Stephen Covey defines it, seeks first to understand, then to be understood. The focus is not on yourself, but on helping someone else. These seven questions might help you become aware of some poor leadership traits you’ve developed. Remember, awareness is half the battle in making positive changes in your life. I welcome your comments!
In the last Southwestern sales blog, I explored the notion of 4 conversational levels, and how it helps to get a prospect to a feeling level when you are selling. People buy products for a variety of feelings:
- Peace of mind
- Love
- A sense of security
- Fear of loss
- Providing a good environment for their children
Try asking feeling-oriented questions. 
All of these reasons are also feelings. In the Southwestern introduction phase of the cycle of selling, try inserting a couple feeling-oriented questions:
- “Mrs. Jones, what is most important when it comes to your children and their education?”
- “A lot of moms have told me that, by why is it important to you?”
Ask these questions after you’ve established rapport. To the first, prospects will likely give you “standard” answers—in the Southwestern example, she’ll probably say, “…to get a good job” or “…to help them prepare for a career.” You want to dig deeper. Question #2 does that. In essence, you’re saying, “Thanks for the nice, generic answer, but really…can we talk?” The first question opens up the topic; the follow up question goes deeper and is more personal.
If the prospect responds with a feeling level answer, you are getting somewhere. “I didn’t finish school and it’s always bothered me.” You have touched an emotional topic. You can draw her out by asking, “Tell me more.” If she responds with: “I’ve always felt the only thing that cost more than a good education is not having one.” Hot button! I would follow up with: “Wow, Mrs. Jones, that’s pretty profound—why do you feel that way?” Why questions help at this point. Get them talking and keep them talking. NOTE: Learn to recognize an emotional topic when you hear it; a conversation can be emotional in nature yet be visibly unemotional, if that makes sense. She will probably not burst into tears.
If you have examples, please comment! Remember, the more she discusses her situation, her children, her challenges, her feelings, the better. With this new knowledge, you can better show how your product can help fill her needs—in the Southwestern example, her educational needs.
People won’t buy your Southwestern products unless they’re clear that whatever you’re presenting feels intuitively right to them. In other words, your selling proposition must fit their vision of what they want to create in the long term, and combine with their most deeply held values. So, as Sydney Walker tells us in his book, How to Double Your Sales by Asking a Few More Questions, you must ask questions that generate feeling level responses.
In order of conversational depth, here are four areas/topics people discuss:
1. Things
2. People
3. Ideas
4. Feelings
Let’s explore these conversational levels.
Things are easy: the weather, local events, what you do for a living—all these are “safe” conversation points. Talking about people is slightly more volatile, especially if they are controversial, but everyone spends a lot of time talking about other people.
Now defcon 3: Ideas. Ideas are more complex still, since you can be venturing into emotional areas. Remember asking a mom something innocuous, like: “So, Betty, how do you feel about the school system here?” And Boom! You get an earful, since you waded into the arena of ideas, specifically education.
Finally, there is level 4—feelings. Few people openly talk about their feelings, especially with a college student who is sitting in their living room. BUT, it pays to address her emotions. People buy for emotional reasons, and justify their decisions with logic.
Why do people buy things? Using Southwestern as an example, Mrs. Jones buys because she has 1) a loving obligation to provide for her children and 2) a sense of responsibility for her children and their lives. These reasons are also feelings. How you get her to tap into a “feeling level” will be discussed in the next blog. Stay tuned and feel free to comment—it will help our other Southwestern salespeople!
There are far more than five ways to destroy a Southwestern sales call. But, in the interest of brevity, and of maintaining my small readership, I’ll narrow this to just five. Remember, selling is a complex activity with many variables. Every prospect is different; every sales encounter has a new twist–especially when you’re dealing with another human being. So here are a five easy ways to sabotage your sale:
1. Opening with an awkward approach. A bad first impression goes a long way. I remember many of my earlier attempts to “be different” at the door. Most often it worked. People smiled. I got in. Occasionally, my
attempts at humor failed. I saw the confusion/annoyance flash on the prospect’s face, and knew I was dead from the start.
2. Monologue-ing. Did you see the cartoon movie, The Incredibles? The arch-villain, Syndrome, catches himself just talking–explaining his diabolical plan at length to the hero. If you’re a villain, monologue-ing can ruin your plans. A one-sided conversation from you, the salesperson, can also ruin your sale. Be sure to initiate a conversation—get them talking and keep them talking.
3. Lack of enthusiasm. If you’re more than a month into the Southwestern summer internship, you’ve given more than 600 demonstrations. You may have noticed that initial burst of excitement is gone! Ho-hum demos don’t fly. One of the challenges in any sales effort is maintaining enthusiasm for what you’re doing and the product you’re demonstrating. Remember, you may have given the demonstration a thousand times—your prospect sees it once.
4. Spending too much time with non-buyers. You can burn a lot of energy with non-prospects. Pay attention to non-verbal feedback! If they’re staring at you, mouth agape, with a faraway look in their eyes, perhaps you are not connecting. If they’re texting or glancing at their watch or their TV, perhaps they are not exactly tuned in and interested. If they walk out of the room during your demo, perhaps you’re not as scintillating as you imagined. Ask, “So, Mrs. Jones, does this look like something the kids would use?” If she says, “Not really”, then leave—save your energy for a buyer!
5. No close. I am stunned by how many Southwestern dealers don’t use the closing steps! They either a) talk until the prospect interrupts with, “Can we buy this? I have to cook dinner.” Or b) they bluntly ask, “So…do you want one?” Awkward. Use the close that has worked for years. Be bold and assumptive!
When selling, you have to be your best self: sharp, engaging, interested, service-minded, friendly…in short, you have to be in a peak state. People respond to you first and your product second. They have good B.S. detectors. They want to deal with your human side first and your Southwestern sales side second.
One element of Southwestern sales success–likeability.
If you attended Southwestern‘s Sales Schools recently, you may recall Nicholas Boothman sharing the idea that before a prospect buys anything, they have to buy you! If they like you, prospects will look for opportunities to say “yes.”
To that end, Tom Hoobyar, NLP Master Practitioner and blogger, shares six good insights about becoming likeable:
1 – The biggest secret of popularity is to give your whole-hearted attention to the other person.
2 – The second biggest secret of being well liked is to forget yourself completely and become genuinely interested in other people.
3 – The third big secret of being popular with others is to learn to listen with everything you’ve got.
4 – The fourth big secret of popularity is not to be a know-it-all. “I didn’t know that!” are magic words.
5 – The fifth big secret of being popular is to admit your mistakes, especially if someone has been hurt or inconvenienced. It’s good to apologize even when it’s not your fault.
6 – The sixth big secret is to say “Thank you” every chance you get.
Everybody cares about himself or herself, so as long as you make someone feel comfortable and interesting, you will be liked and accepted. You can practice this with any other person; it just takes two of you. If you’re on the bookfield, focus on getting Mrs. Jones to like you!
Your likeability is the foundation for trust–one key to a Southwestern sale.
The first three suggestions listed above are attitudinal–they are habits; they are choices. They take effort. It’s easy to have a self-centered attitude. It’s harder to be service-minded (see #6 above). It’s easy to be negative. It takes energy to remain positive and “other-oriented.” What’s the payoff? People will like you. They will want to be around you. They will want to buy from you. Repeatedly.
My first summer with Southwestern, I experienced success and failure to a degree depending on my mental choices. When I entered a home with units/sales on my mind, more often than not, I did not sell. Mrs. Jones came up with a variety of objections to throw my way. Why? I was attempting to sell her (my sales side) rather than serve her. People want to interact with your human side first, then your sales side. The human side–the likeable you–is the part of you they trust and will respond to.
When you’re with a prospect, get them to like you! Your human side is much more appealing than leading with your sales side. Look them in the eye and smile! Listen with everything you’ve got! Be grateful for their time. Let me know your thoughts on the subject of being well-liked. Southwestern students and alumni, feel free to comment.
A review of one of the main themes from Southwestern’s Sales School is that persistence is paramount! We stressed that the answer to your problem lies behind the next door. That going to one more house could make the difference between a good day and a bad one. That there is value in enduring hardship. So how about some fresh quotes to adorn your car or headquarters? Here you go. No charge:
“He conquers who endures.” –Persius
“The odds are with us if we keep on trying.” –DeGreen 
“It helps to consider ourselves on a very long journey: the main thing is to keep to the faith, to endure, to help each other when we stumble or tire, to weep and press on.” –Mary Caroline Richards
“No, there is no failure for the man who realizes his power; who never knows when he is beaten; there is no failure for the determined endeavor; the unconquerable will. There is no failure for the man who gets up every time he falls, who rebounds like a rubber ball, who persists when every one else gives up, who pusher on when everyone else turns back.” –Orison Swett Marden
“Don’t quit.” –Mort Utley
“I get knocked down, but I get up again…!” –Chumbawamba
“Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” –Confucius
“You become a champion by fighting one more round. When things are tough, you fight one more round.” –James Corbett
“I have competed well; I have finished the race; I have kept the faith!” –St. Paul
“Most people give up just when they’re about to achieve success. They quit on the one yard line. They give up at the last minute of the game, one foot from a winning touchdown.” –Ross Perot
“But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)” –Dr. Suess
There is value in persistence. What thoughts or quotes motivate you to continue to work when you don’t feel like it? Southwestern alumni, current Southwestern students: feel free to comment!
Did Shakespeare sell with Southwestern? Uh, no. But, in Hamlet, Act II, Scene 2, his main character declares: “For there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
So it is with selling. Your encounters, your closing victories, your frustrations, your close misses—all are subject to your own internal voice. The voice which is always evaluating, judging, and commenting as you go through your day. My first summer with Southwestern, I constantly found myself at the mercy of my own thoughts, so I eventually figured out that I could divide my thoughts into two categories:
Useful thoughts and Useless thoughts.
I discovered my natural negativity. Left to myself, my internal dialogue as a rookie with Southwestern was not uplifting:
“Do I like this?” No.
“Am I good at selling?” Not really.
“Do people out here like me?” Apparently not. Or better yet:
“I suck at selling. This is not fun. People out here are idiots….”
And so it went. Consciously, I had to replace useless thoughts and negative internal conversations with more helpful stuff, like:
“I can, I will, and I’m going to do well with Southwestern.”
“Something about today will help me 5 years from now.”
“Progress, not perfection.”
“This situation will make a great story someday…”.
“I will laugh about this one day, so why not laugh now?”
I had to say positive affirmations out loud or my mind would gravitate to the dark side. I found by saying positive phrases aloud, my mind would paint a useful picture. I would visualize what I wanted to happen rather than wallowing in negative images and thoughts.
Southwestern strategy for winning in sales: Entertain only those thoughts which build you up; trash the rest.
What thoughts help you feel confident? What thoughts drain you? You must control that 6″ terrain between your ears! If this is your first summer with Southwestern, why not begin to monitor your thoughts? Pretend to hook up a digital recorder to your brain, and begin to notice your recurring thoughts. Are they useful or useless? Do they build your confidence, or do your thoughts tear you down? I welcome your comments—if you’re selling with Southwestern, share your best, most helpful thoughts/affirmations.
Headline: Another Southwestern summer is underway!
We just launched another 700 eager students this week–on their way to success and fortune!
Now, for those Southwestern dealers who are just getting started: prepare to struggle. Someone once said, “A job worth doing is worth doing badly, at first.” So it is with learning to sell. You may remember my Dirt Pile talk, and I thought a quick flashback might be instructive to our neophyte sellers:
Remember when you played sports? Remember the workouts, the two-a-days, the weights, the wind sprints, the “no-breathers” (swimming), those end of practice “suicides”? After your off-season, getting in shape was tough–remember? What kept you going?
Somewhere in your brain you decided a couple things…
1) It is worth it.
2) I’ll get better.
You decided that the pain, fear, frustration, and upset-ness would decrease and your feeling of success would eventually increase. During my first summer with Southwestern, I remember oftentimes leaving without a sale, and forcing some affirmations out of my mouth: “I can, I will, and I’m going to be successful at this!” I affirmed, out loud, what I wanted to happen.
Now, think back to when you were just learning a new skill–like playing a musical instrument. Were you great at first? Ready for a recital? No! Your fingering was lousy, your scales sounded like you were using your fists. Learning to play was slow and awkward. So here’s a corollary: “A job worth doing, is also worth doing awkwardly, at first.” Essentially, we’ve given you just a few sales lessons and now you’re giving 20-minute recitals in Mrs. Jones’ home! Ouch. Awkward!
It’s OK to be frustrated–you can spend hours contemplating the decision to sell on your own personal “dirt pile”, but remember the helpful thoughts you had when you were getting in shape for sports or learning to play a new instrument: It is worth it. I’ll get better. Your belief in your goal helped you persevere. Your belief in your ability to improve helped you stick with it.
So, if you’re new to selling, whether it’s Southwestern or retail or route sales, remember you’ll improve if you believe in yourself and the process. Stick with it and guard your thoughts!
Southwestern Company: Great Advice from John Maxwell
Hey Southwestern students, sales managers, alumni and executives! Here is a short, pithy article from John Maxwell’s leadership blog. This is great advice for people who have to present to audiences or make group presentations. It is also great sales advice when you’re in a one-on-one Southwestern demonstration. Avoid the ya-da ya-da’s.
Communicating 101 [read "Southwestern Company Sales Tips 101"]
“Instructions for making a speech: Be sincere; be brief; be seated.” 
~ Franklin D. Roosevelt
In Communication, Speaking Overtime Is a Crime, so…SAY IT SOONER
Mark Twain once attended a church service during which the city missionary passionately appealed for donations to aid the community’s poor.
“The appeal had so stirred me that I could hardly wait for the [offering] plate to come my way. I had four hundred dollars in my pocket, and I was anxious to drop it in the plate and wanted to borrow more. But the plate was so long in coming my way that the fever-heat of beneficence was going down lower and lower – going down at the rate of a hundred dollars a minute. The plate was passed too late. When it finally came to me, my enthusiasm had gone down so much that I kept my four hundred dollars – and stole a dime from the plate. So, you see, time sometimes leads to crime…”
The long-winded preacher had persuaded Twain, but then proceeded to drone on for so long that he nullified the appeal his message. The moral of the story? Be brief.
In Communication, Complexity Is Creepy, so…SAY IT SIMPLER
When communicators try to say too much they creep away from their main idea. Too many points and principles muddy the message. Communicators need to adjust their volume—not by raising their decibel level, but by cutting back on their amount of content. Our words purchase the most when spent sparingly.
In Communication, Audiences Are Forgetful, so…SAY IT STICKIER
Great speakers communicate memorable messages that stick in the minds of the audience. Don’t be lazy and merely share information; put in the energy and effort to say things in an interesting way. Couch your core ideas in catchy slogans that the audience can quickly latch onto and easily recall. Use shocking statements or statistics to lower your predictability and pique the interest of listeners. Finally, and most importantly, craft your speech in a way that connects with the wants of the audience. People perk up and pay attention when they hear something that addresses their deeply felt needs.
Get to the point! Be succinct and memorable. Then be quiet. How many of us have talked ourselves out of a sale because we spoke too much? Blah, blah, blah. How many of us have watched entire rows of students fall asleep in Southwestern’s Sales School because we loved the sound of our voices? I welcome comments or examples.
Southwestern Company students: Don’t saturate Mrs. Jones with too many words–take heed of this sage advice!
So, it’s getting close to the summer, and you have a potential Southwestern team member who’s a bit shaky with their commitment to work with you. Let’s discuss another way to influence people positively.
Quit talking about Southwestern!
Go to their world! Give them examples of what working with Southwestern is like in terms and
contexts they can relate to.
Help them understand that Southwestern is just another arena not unlike what they’ve already experienced in their lives. Examples:
- Working in the Southwestern program is like asking someone out…it’s scary at first but once you make the call, it gets easier.
- Remember your transition to college from high school? What was it like? How did you do it? Southwestern is a lot like that–it’s a little intimidating at first, but you figure it out.
- Think about your first big regional swim meet (or track or volleyball or golf). How did you cope? How did you feel? How did you sort it out and compete? How did you prepare?
I’d ask questions to discover their context, then go there to explain Southwestern. I am a swimmer, so it would be smart to build my confidence in a competitive swimming context. Questions like, “How did you get better and more confident as a swimmer?” Response: “I listened to the coach. I practiced a lot. I paid my dues in the pool. I worked on my stroke and technique.” Student Manager: “Perfect. Same principles apply at Southwestern. You do those things at Southwestern, and you’ll be awesome.”
Hmmm. I don’t know anything about selling, but I do know swimming. Confidence growing!
Whatever level of fear they’re feeling regarding Southwestern is OK.
What they’re feeling is normal. You don’t want to say, “Wow. There’s nothing to be afraid of, Bob, I can’t believe you’re such a wuss.” Just acknowledge their trepidation, and tell them it’s normal–it’s OK to be a little hesitant. In fact, you felt the same way at first! Share your story. Your goal is to 1) go to their world, 2) acknowledge and affirm their feelings, and 3) build them up in terms of what they know.
Why waste time re-explaining what Southwestern is like? Why not explain it in terms of what they can relate to? This is a great way to build a team member’s confidence, reassure them, and insure that they will be a part of your Southwestern team!
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